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February 21, 2011

The Embarrassed Republican: The pants-ing of Scott Walker

Well, last week was a red letter event for the Grand Old Party, one of our reactionary governors actually managed to fill his entire state house with people who though he was an idiot.  And they’re still there, 5 days later.  What’s the number now Govenor? Is it 50 or 60 thousand?  Just how much Cum-bai-ya are you willing to listen to?  You do know your state is full of retirees from the sixties right?  Are you waiting for them to get their flowered shirts and beads out of the attic?

Although we did manage to bus in some fierce Tea Party supporters, we’re sorry that didn’t last longer.  The Asian tour group wouldn’t get on the busses again without the promise of free “cheese-head” hats.  However, Glen Beck is working on a new black board conspiracy that involves socialist teachers and garbagemen worshiping Stalin’s tooth paste “Communi-fresh.”  You know “Brush away that pesky freedom stuck between your teeth,” it’s a pip!

But guys, here’s the bottom line.  We’re in debt some 22 million or so, and all that lovely Koch money is getting farther and farther away.  If Governor Walker gets a pants-down union spanking in front of the entire nation, we can kiss those oil dollars goodbye.  I know for a fact Chris Christie has already switched to a belt and suspenders.  Getting rid of the EPA will only get us so far, saying “you can make all the smog you want, but it has to be union smog” isn’t going to cut it.

To top it off Sunday broadcasts featured George Soros looking more like everyone’s kindly grandfather than the devil he’s supposed to be.  What happened to the video effects that would always add red horns and a tail to him every time he came on?  He’s supposed to be impishly capering over a burning nation, not gently saying that Obama has lost the initiative in the budget battle.  That puts the initiative on us, guys.  Do you think Boehner likes being in the spot light holding a bag of crappy do-nothing ideas?  Don’t answer that!

And what’s with Boehner’s brilliant “…so be it” to thousands of people loosing their jobs?   Can’t we get ‘old weepy’ some cue cards or something? By the way no one is buying the “pronunciation” John.  Your name rhymes with “donor”, we know that every time you open your mouth.

It doesn’t take Wisconsin chanting  “Hosni, Hosni he’s our man…” to show that we’re developing a slight negative “rut-age” here.  Could some one please tell Walker to shut up about the National Guard already?  Next he’ll be cutting off Internet access.  Dude, cut a deal before they bring the tar and feathers.

Seriously, if we don’t get our act in in gear here soon, we’re going to have to join with the green party next.  It’s almost 2012 and were wading though the alligators in pork pants.  We’re in severe danger of being the disaster predicted by the Mayan calendar.

Copyright Prentiss Gray 2011

Prentiss Gray is a writer and columnist and currently writes the Domesti-Tech Blog for Gannett.  He can be reached through his website at www.prentissgray.com

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Prentiss Gray

Prentiss Gray is a writer/columnist/blogger from New Jersey. After 27 years as a Information Systems consultant and the death of his wife of 21 years, he returned to his roots as a writer, creating the national column Adventures of the Lone Dad/ Daddy chronicles. He now Blogs for Gannet on domestic technology, and writes feature pieces and stories for general publication. He is a member of the American Society of Journalists and Authors and contributes to Bloomberg News, Daily Record, Gannett and the Tribune Syndicate.

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